First-Time Managers Leading People with Strengths

Part 4 of First-Time Managers Leading Their People with Strengths. Gallup's Q12® says received, not given. Whether your praise counts is up to the person catching it.

Part 3 of this series had you hand off one piece of work on purpose, matched to a theme instead of a calendar. This last article is about what you say when they do it well, and why the same thank-you lands on one person and bounces off another.

One person lit up. The other wanted the floor to open up.

You did the thing. You noticed good work and you said so. In front of the whole team, even.

One person lit up. The other one wanted the floor to open up and swallow them.

Same words. Same manager. Same good intentions. If you have read the first three parts of this series, you know where this is going.

Received, not given

Recognition is the fourth item on Gallup's Q12®, the twelve statements Gallup uses to measure employee engagement: "In the last seven days, I have received recognition or praise for doing good work."

Notice what it does not say. It does not say recognition in front of everyone. It does not say a plaque, a shout-out at the all-hands, or a gift card. It says RECEIVED. Recognition only counts if it lands, and whether it lands depends on who is catching it.

What Madi taught me about an espresso

One thing I learned, but never properly implemented leading teams, was Appreciation at Work (basically the five love languages, but work appropriate). One thing I did learn about Madi, one of the first people I ever managed, is that she is an Acts of Service person. She did not really care to hear how well I thought she did something. She would much rather I make her an espresso, or even better, go pick one up from someone who actually knew how to make a proper espresso.

Same good work. Same manager. The words bounced off. The coffee landed.

Three things that change the shape of recognition

None of them are about how much.

1. Public or private.

Some people would frame the all-hands shout-out. Others hear their name in a room and want to leave it. If you are not sure which one you have, ask. You have a one-on-one for exactly that.

2. The work or the person.

"This report was exactly what we needed" and "you are so reliable" are not the same compliment. One points at the work. The other points at who they are. Some people are fed by one and oddly unmoved by the other.

3. Who it comes from.

For some people it has to come from you, their manager, or it does not count. For others, what the customer said or what a teammate noticed matters more, and your job is to pass it along instead of saying it yourself.

Madi taught me a fourth. For some people it is not words at all.

Ask how they like to be recognized

Back in Part 2 you asked your people what they need from you. Did you ask how they like to be recognized? Most of us never have.

Give the shout-out to the person who wanted a quiet thank-you, and you have not recognized them. You have embarrassed them, and counted it as recognition.

The assignment: recognize one thing on purpose

Don't launch a recognition program. Don't buy anything. This week, catch one person doing good work and tell them in the shape THEY would choose, not the one you would.

For now you only have to RECOGNIZE one thing on purpose.

That is the whole series. Four weeks ago you only had to SEE the difference between a performance problem and a person who is wired differently than you. Then ASK, in a one-on-one that is not a status update. Then ASSIGN, by theme instead of by who has time. Now RECOGNIZE, in the shape that lands.

Four verbs. None of them need a budget, a program, or a reorganization. Just a manager who stopped treating every person on the team like an earlier version of themselves.

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More in this series

Part 1: Why the Golden Rule Stops Working When You Become a Manager

Part 2: How to Run a One-on-One That Is Not a Status Update

Part 3: How to Delegate by Strengths Instead of by Who Has Time

Part 4: How to Give Recognition That Actually Lands (this article)

If you are planning a workshop

I facilitate CliftonStrengths®, team development, and first-time manager workshops. A manager who knows how each person on the team receives recognition keeps the people a generic "great job" would have lost. If first-time managers are on your company's 2027 budget list, connect with me on LinkedIn and tell me about it.

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